As part of the moving process, we need to transfer our phone and high-speed Internet service. We've been using Verizon's cheap DSL for a while, however it is not available in Teaneck. Only FiOS. Expensive FiOS. While attempting to see if I could get a price reduction in FiOS since I'm currently paying less for Verizon DSL, I clicked on the "Chat with a live person" link. The canned responses, essential uselessness and lack of emoticons of this chat made the Verizon service person ('Lisa' - they even include the quotes) seem more like a robot than an actual robot. But I figured I'd check if perhaps they have a box where they're allowed to type something on their own volition. Below is an exerpt from the chat transcript:
me: I have another questionWhat's weird, is that somehow the options they have to choose from do not always guarantee perfect grammar: "for get more information..." rather than "to get..." Maybe they have a list of options to construct sentences, but not full freedom to speak as they might normally?
Lisa: Please proceed with your question. I am here to assist you.
me: Can you please send me a message consisting of the text "Mickey Mouse ate Rodgers and Hammerstein"
Lisa: I am sorry we do not have information on that.
me: OK, that's what I figured
Lisa: You just need to call local office for get more information on that.
me: Excellent, I will ask the local office to tell me that "Mickey Mouse ate Rodgers and Hammerstein"
In any case, I think when I do call the local office, I'll try the "OK, I'll call Comcast, then" method of bargaining. Thank goodness for at least a little smidgen of competition.